Regret??

Sometimes I'm doubt that is it a good choice for me that I'm taking Biology for my STPM. Somehow, I knew that it's too late for regret. That's human nature i think. Always will not satisfied with whatever it is. Seem like that's too hard to change. But I believe that I will manage to get rid of such thinking and start working hard on my studies. About future? Think after STPM... No A's for STPM, no University.. Therefore, there will be no future... So, stop dreaming and WORK for it... ;-)

And, stop regreting for something that had happened but regret before it happened so you manage to make the changes to correct all the wrong/ faulty.

The attitude....

Sometimes I does doubt whether it's the nature of human or it's the attitute of oneself...
Is it that when there's something happened, the person involve directly or indirectly also will be the same? When a things that referred to them, surely they will answer back "saya tak tahu ( I dunno)" What has caused the younger generation to be in such attitute? Do the younger generation know what is responsiblity? I doubt that they don't know.

Just as an example.

Situation 1.
A few days back, a duty was passed to a Form4 (16years old) student, and was telling the things that he/she has to do, the responds that he/she gave was I dont know how to do, I dont want to do... What kind of attitude is this? Giving up before give it a try?

Situation 2.
A Form5 (17years old) student, promised to summit the things on the day itself and ended up he/she summit it 2days later. The first day, he/she told that, ok.. ok .. I will send it to your class after recess. but until school break, the forms were not summitted yet. Then, the next day, being asked again... the answer he gave was I only will get 2forms today morning. ok, i go to take for you now. Ended up, another day had came. On the third day, he/she only send 2fellows to summit the forms.

Situation 3.
The ex-treasurer did not give the money and bank book to the new treasurer.. when ask to the ex-treasurer, the answer he/she gave was "ok, i will give u on next month". Is this known as responsiblity?

Situation 4.
The one who incharge of buying things for the fellow members did not take fully responsible, all he/she let was asking someone else to solve for him/her. Ended up, the things that he/she bought was insufficient and the remains have to repay by someone else. Is this also known as responsiblity by the younger generation nowadays?

Situation 5.
A group of youth were hapily planned to held a party, they promised this and that and asked someone to cook and also promised the one who will cook that he/she will send someone to help you. But, what's the result? The one who cook had to go to buy the material by himself/herself and cooked by himself/herself without any help from anyone? It's just because the one who promised said, "I'm sorry but I'm very busy today". That's the responsiblity of the one who promised???

Situation 6.
A society which has about 100 members, called out a meeting... The members who turned up were only about a quarter of it. The reason they gave was "my parents dont let me go to the meeting" or "I'm sick" but in fact, you see them wondering around the town. Then, what's the point that they join the society when there's the meeting but never turn up?

Situation 7.
When asking a question to someone, the one who might able to give the answer or find out the answer for us will pint-point to another person. The reason given was, "it was his/her responsiblity about the things not me". Then, when we referred to the person involved, another answer was "not me, it's him/her who incharge of it".

So in conclusion, what's the responsiblity for the younger generation nowadays? Do responsiblity have in them? Is this the attitude of the younger generation? If this is it, how the future world will be? A world without responsiblity? The future ruler, that can't be rely on?

MISSING YOU.......

It's already almost a week i had lost my phone. I'd also cried for a week as i cant keep in touch with bb... I missed him so much and i can't even msg or call him. It's even worst that i can't even get a msg from him. NOT EVEN ONE.... I'd been missing him for a month... At first, we were planning to meet today but he was sick 2 days ago and not totally well yet. Hoping that as he said, he will be able to come over. I hope that i can meet him. I really miss u bb... I will always keep our promise!!!

LOVE YOU forever and ever.......

The Lost

It's already 2days i dropped my mobile. I was very worried when i realized i'd drop it but it's too late. Someone else picked it up before me. I rang Bb and told him about it... then i started to cry for loosing it. Since that day, I'd been crying on and off unrealising it. This is because my mobile is just like my life. It is the only thing that pull us together and closer our gap as we are having long distance relationship. And I dropped it, is this means it will bring to the end of our relation soon? I missed Bb so much. Today I used mom's phone to insert my sim card and sms with Bb. I told him about this coming Saturday is a school day. Then, he told me that he doesn't want to meet me that day 'coz it will be a tired day... But does he know that he actually broke down my hope and wish of meeting him. Weeks by weeks, we waited for so long to have a chance to meet but it's just gone...
I cried day and night because of missing him too much... If to compare, last time although when we were out of credit and unable to send sms, at least there's some old msg that I can read to bring back some memories but now it's just everything in mind... Nothing else.

Bebee, I want u to know that.. babey will love you forever and missing you always...

Excited --------> Disappointed

Yesterday just about to the midnight mom told me that sis will come back from KL. At that time, all sorts of feelings and thoughts came into my mind. Then I told him that I unable to meet up with him again for the second time. At that time, I really felt that everything has gone, all my wish have faded. From a very excited feeling to meet, ended up with just a hope wish will never fulfilled. All the disappointment made my tears to wash my face once again.

Today once woke up from bed, I still felt the disappointment of yesterday. As usual I went to school and came back home. Then, about a few text of sms, I'd stopped telling him that it's time for him to do his thing. Thru out the whole day, I'd sms him. I felt all the disappointment... and I also did not feel any concern and love from him.... I felt that there's such a big gap between both of us. Is there really a big gap between both of us? Is there anything that can help to solve it? Will we stay forever like that??? PLZ DON'T!!!!!!!

Sad birthday??!!!

I'm waiting for today to come because we had promise to meet, but unfortunately something which unpredictable happenned. His mom fainted and hospitalized last nite, and his sibling was sick. His phone were out of credit. So, he didn't msg me at all to inform me about it and did not tell me that he was unable to come. Until at around 10am, I called him and he told me that not to be offend about what he's going to tell me. He told that he was unable to come to be with me and celebrate my birthday together. At that moment, my tears started to drop and wet my face again... Once again I cried. He tried to talk a lot to me but i just dont know... that moment all my hope were fade and my heart were broken... then i just told him that i got to hang up and i'd hang up the phone. Then, when i was about to have my breakfast my face was just so dull and sad look... Even when mom wished me happy birthday also, i just look at her without a smile on my face.

Since morning, I never have a really happy feelings at all. After my breakfast, I had online then i take a nap from around 3pm until 6pm... All I'd done today was just sit, watch tv, online, sleep eat and cry....
I missed him... Is it our fate that we are not allowed to celebrate birthday together? All I can do is just crying.....

However, I want to thank to all my friends that have sent sms, testimonials, emails and e-cards to wish me. I also would like to thank to my mom who have help me to bake my cake. And also would like to thank to Wei Yak and Steven for the presents. Thanks to u guys and gals....

LOVE YOU ALL.........

Darling Bb, Honey Babey miss you very much.... Babey hope to be with Bb forever....

Babey love Bb forever and miss Bb always.........

should be happy or sad?!

Today morning at about 10am, my "god-sister - kak fatimah" came to school. I'd lost contact with her for about 2years. The last time I saw her was somewhere in the beginning of January 2005. And she pop-up in front of me. We chatted for awhile then were rushing for recess and class. I'd been missing her for so many years and now she pop in front of me. But sad to say, i did not manage to get her contact numbers. She also forgotten that tomorrow will be my birthday. I hope she never forget her this so called "god-sister"....

I MISSED YOU!!!!!!!!!! hope that you will keep in touch with me in any way.

The moment towards 12am of 13th January 2007 it's really a though moment to go thru. When it's about 8pm, I was happily that wishing that I manage to bake a cake for my birthday. Although i turn out not as nice as what i wish yet still ok. But when it's about to 11pm, my feeling, minds and thoughts changed. I wished that at least he can keep on messaging with me till 11.59pm of 12th January yet it didn't happen. He sent a picture msg to me and ended up he finished his phone's credit by 11.30pm... I really wish that he can be with me by my side. The moment that I'm wishing did not happened. My heart really change in just a second. I was very cheerful all the while as i knew that I'll be meeting him soon but just as the moment near to the midnite it totally changed... I cried, feeling heart broken... It's really disappointing... I tried to sleep before the moment of 11.59pm reached but I cant managed to sleep. All I can do that time is just crying.

My darling, I am very sorry that I can't do it. You told me not to disappointed or sad that he can't accompany me till the moment 11.59pm but i tried. i told myself to be more matured and understand the situation but i just cant.

DARLING, I'm sorry!!!!!!!!!!!!